


to tame a falcon

by orphan_account



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Jalec Week, M/M, Parabatai
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-20
Updated: 2017-02-20
Packaged: 2018-09-25 21:49:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9847133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: In which the Lightwoods never left the Circle and died shortly before the end of the war, leaving Alec and Izzy under the tutelage of the Clave.ForJalec Week, day 2 - "Shadow World AU".





	

Jace was ten when he first set foot in the New York Institute. He hadn’t really wanted to go – would have preferred to stay in Idris, under the tutelage of Inquisitor Herondale, who had been the only one to take care of him after his father’s...  – but she had decided it would be better for him to go live in an Institute now, and he had been shipped off to New York.

The Institute was a bit of an oddity – no family was its Head anymore since the last one had been killed during the war – and Clave’s envoys were taking turns being in charge, all under the authority of the Inquisitor. The current envoy was a man from the Aldertree family, and he did look a bit _young_ to Jace to be in charge, but it wasn’t his place to comment on the situation.

Not when he had to settle in. Besides, Inquisitor Herondale had told him she would be the one responsible for him until he reached his eighteenth birthday, so he figured he could just put up with the man until he left.

He would only have to be careful not get attached, in the meantime, but Jace had the sneaky feeling that was unlikely to happen. His first days at the Institute had been uneventful enough – people had only looked at him upon his arrival, before dismissing him as one of the new trainees, and he had been left mostly alone, afterwards – which had allowed to wander and explore him on his own. Shadowhunters didn’t care about children wandering off, especially not when a little group already was at the Institute for training, and he could make himself unremarkable enough so that he wouldn’t be bothered. On the other hand, it meant that he also stumbled upon a few scenes that left him rather uneasy… and with no one to turn to, to get explanations.

There were a couple of other children his age, but two seemed to be the target of everybody’s ire every time something went wrong – be it a training session not as efficient as it could have been, disruptions during classes or even chores that weren’t done in time. Hodge Starkweather was the only one who didn’t go too hard on the Lightwood children, but Jace wasn’t sure it meant anything.

And he _really_ wanted to know why everyone seemed to think these two orphans were dangerous traitors when people had been nothing but compassionate towards _him_.

(He didn’t know, of course, that the Inquisitor’s shadow was hovering over him and Imogen Herondale was one force to be reckoned with in the Nephilim’s society. Gossips and rumors sure traveled _fast_ , and everyone knew the poor Wayland boy wasn’t as alone as he might have been. Whoever would have thought it a good idea to try and groom him into something else than the best fighter the Shadowhunter training could offer knew they would face the wrath of the Inquisitor – a fate no one was interested in.)

(A few days later, when he finally realized the reason behind people’s behavior towards the Lightwood, he couldn’t help but be disappointed in himself. _Of course,_ he knew why there were treated like that – his father had told him of the Lightwoods, a few times, how they had been killed shortly before the end of the war, and the Clave had decided to keep a tight leash on the children of dead Circle members. Wouldn’t want to them to grow up to become like their parents – traitors to the Clave. _Of course_ , everyone was harsh on them.)

(You needed a firm hand to keep children on track, Jace knew it far too well.)

(Still, he couldn’t help but be curious about them – how pale and withdrawn they always were, refusing to let anyone in, and fiercely protective of each other. He was a bit envious of their bond, truth be told.)

ooOoo

Alec Lightwood reminded him of his falcon – wild and half-feral, but also fiercely independent and protective of his little sister. It was rare not to see them together, but Jace had studied them long enough to know that the boy liked to go to the training room very early in the morning, to get the hand of a bow and the quivers associated. He suspected Hodge knew about it, but didn’t have a problem with that choice of weapon, although they weren’t supposed to use it during their training sessions in broad daylight.

(Hodge _had_ a soft spot for the Lightwood children, Jace was sure of it.)

The other boy had disappeared for a few days after a fight with another kid of the Institute, leaving Isabelle alone, and Jace had noticed how people – other children and some of the teenagers – had been circling around her, taunting her, trying to make her trip in the corridors and being very unpleasant overall. She had borne it with the same cold air she always had, but Jace had spotted the way her eyes had brightened in the middle of the third day – just a couple of hours before Alec had come back, pale and tight faced. Jace hadn’t even known where he had gone, but no one had seemed surprised at that, and that damn Preston had looked rather smug… he had been the one to lead the charge against Isabelle, too.

All in one, Jace couldn’t say he had been surprised that Alec had snapped and punched him in the face. He, too, would have lost his cool – and far earlier, probably, but no one bothered him. His fighting skills were too good for the other children to deal with, and even the teenagers were impressed.

His father would have been proud.

Maybe.

But Jace had been patient and observant enough – he knew enough of the dynamics now, had spent six months here already, and he was sure it was time for him to make the first move. He wanted a friend, and Alec Lightwood looked like the perfect candidate – if he could convince him he wasn’t the enemy.

Well, that wasn’t going to be the easiest part for sure.

ooOoo

Going to the training room at the time and training in silence with his knives had been a smart move. The other boy had been spooked, at first, curled on himself and almost looking like he was ready for a fight, but Jace had been careful to nod at him before giving him space and taking his knives out, focused on his own training.

Taming his falcon had taken time, too.

But this time, _months_ had gone by before he started seeing the first results. Hell, he had thought it would never worked, once two months had gone by without any change, but little things were different, now. The Lightwood children seemed to be in his vicinity more often since a couple of weeks, during the day, and he and Alec were always seated close to one another during classes – which meant that no one was trying to bother him anymore. Jace didn’t think his reputation had something to do with that, but the fact that he was willing to stay close to Alec whenever he could… well, people stayed clear of them both, which was a good thing.

And Hodge didn’t seem to mind either, which was good, given that they were spending _a lot_ of time in the training room under his tutelage. They had started sparring one on one now and he and Alec always ended up together. No one wanted to train with Alec – or those who did had an idea in mind, and it usually ended with an _iratze_ being drawn on the young trainees. But when _he_ was training with Alec… well, he was glad he had had his own training with his father, of course he was, but it was fun to train with someone his age – someone who wasn’t afraid to push as hard as he did.

Hell, if their training time together early in the morning had taught him anything, it was that Alec was as dedicated to becoming a Shadowhunter as he himself was. He knew he had made the right choice in picking him – same goals and everything.

“Maybe we could spare together before Hodge’s class,” Jace finally said one morning, careful to keep his body relaxed as he made the suggestion.

He could see Alec looking at him from the corner of his eye, his grip more than firm on the bow he was using. He had come up particularly early that morning, awoken by a nightmare that was all too familiar, and had been surprised to see that Alec had entered the room barely a few minutes later, even more tense than usual. They had looked at each other for a moment before Alec had went to get his bow and they had resumed their regular training schedule, silence falling over them.

“Why?” Alec finally asked, a bit incredulous, setting his bow aside carefully.

Jace shrugged, keeping up the cool façade.

“Why not? We already spar together most of the time and –”

“Why do you want to spend time with me?”

The question got him by surprise. Jace really looked at Alec this time, noticing the bags under his eyes, whose hazel color seemed even more intense in the pale morning light than usual.

“Because I _like_ spending time with you?” Jace finally answered, his voice sounding more unsure than he would have wanted it to.

He felt close to the other boy, somehow, and drawn to him, despite not knowing why. There was something in his attitude – his dedication to all their classes and training, the fierce, protective love he had for his sister, the way he remained unflinching calm in front of everything that was thrown at him…

“I like training with you. We’re good together,” and this time, he sounded a lot more assured – and he knew perfectly well the truth of his words.

Alec didn’t look very convinced, but Jace was sure he could win him over, given time.

“Come on, you must have noticed it, too,” Jace insisted, and was rewarded with a slow nod.

He held his breath for a second, waiting to see if he had made his case convincingly enough. It was important not to push too much – his falcon had bitten him a lot, in the early weeks of his taming.

“Okay,” Alec finally said, a bit reluctantly, still guarded.

Jace couldn’t stop the smile that blossomed on his face – and was delighted to see a smile grow on Alec’s face in return, albeit smaller.

“Great! Shall we get ready?”

Things were shaping up to be _good_ , now.

ooOoo

Becoming friend with Alec had been a slow process, but now, four years later, Jace knew he had made the best decision possible. The Inquisitor hadn’t liked it, but she hadn’t put her veto to it either, and that was enough for Jace – he and Alec had gotten enough crap from the other trainees at the Institute, but it was easier to ignore it when they were together. And Izzy was better off for it, too – she was shaping up to be a pretty good Shadowhunter, and her hunger for knowledge made her a pupil quite appreciated from their teachers – even those who had misgivings, given her family name.

That Alec was holding himself to a higher level of expectations than everyone else at the Institute seemed to help, too, somehow. People were less inclined to call the Lightwood siblings _dirty traitors_ now – not to their face anyway, and not where Jace could hear it either.

 _“The honor is in the deed, not in the name,”_ Alec had said, one day, when Jace had asked him why he was so hard on himself. _“Izzy and I have to prove ourselves to the Clave,”_ he had added in a smaller voice, and Jace had hugged him, wishing – not for the first time – that they weren’t all judged on their parents’ actions.

Oh, _he_ didn’t have to complain, but it was a lot harder on his friends than on him.

And he wanted to protect Alec from all that – all the pain and misery he had to go through at the Institute, because people were unable to see any further than his family name. If they did, they would know that Alec was brave and kind and loyal, and dedicated to the Clave – and so very loving, but they only saw his cold, harsh façade, and decided he would probably follow in his parents’ footsteps.

Jace knew better.

What he also knew what that he wanted to follow in _his_ father’s footsteps on one thing. He wasn’t sure he was supposed to know it – in fact, he was rather convinced of the opposite – but Hodge had seen him reading a bunch of books on the _parabatai_ bond lately, and had looked at him in such a strange way that Jace had been bound to ask him questions. And the answers he had gotten… well, he had dug through the Institute’s archives and had found that his father and Alec’s had been _parabatai_ too, in the past – before Robert Lightwood had been killed, shortly after the end of the war. And if there was one thing to emulate here… well, Jace would be careful to make sure he and Alec had their happy ending – or that they would die together in the battlefield, if it had to come down to that.

Now, he only needed to bring the topic to Alec without messing it up.

And _that_ was difficult.

Talking about the _parabatai_ during class and for their homework had been easy enough – oh, the glory to be part of such a sacred bond! To become a pair of the best fighters Shadowhunters had to offer! Alec had seemed to be really into it – drawn to the prestige of the situation, and to the promise of never being _alone_ in the world. But when Jace had started talking about it more often, almost daydreaming about it… well, Alec had closed off, and now seemed to be rather pissed off every time Jace brought it up, even though he made an effort of hiding it.

Jace couldn’t understand why. He was _certain_ they would make the best pair of _parabatai_ Nephilims had ever seen but seeing Alec so hostile to the idea… well, it made him a doubt a little.

Izzy didn’t have those reservations though, and she rolled her eyes a lot every time she heard them talk about it – well, more like every time _he_ was talking about it and Alec was turning all closed off.

Apparently, there was something he was missing, but he couldn’t figure out _what_.

He knew the Inquisitor wouldn’t like it – hell, she didn’t like _anything_ that involved the Lightwoods, but she was the one who had sent him to the New York Institute, fully knowing they were being raised here, so he had learned not to care about it.

“– and can you imagine fighting a den of vampires? The stories in the Codex said that the best pairs of _parabatai_ could do it on their own! Just the two of them! How cool is that, honestly?”

Alec hummed, not even looking up from his book. They were lounging in his room and were supposed to be doing their homework, but Jace had taken care of his earlier in the day – not wanting to be disturbed by something as menial as _homework_ , honestly – and Alec being Alec, his own was already long done. The mood was relaxed enough – as relaxed as it could be, given that Alec was still sporting the bruises from a training session that had almost gone wrong, by Shadowhunters standards, had Hodge not stepped in – but Jace was still careful not to move too much on the bed. Broken ribs were never fun to deal with until the _iratze_ were done healing them.

“I don’t think vampires would let themselves mess up that bad for the Clave to go and destroy a whole clan, though,” Jace went on, keeping his eyes on Alec, whose eyes were fixed on the page in front of him. “I mean they’re careful now, right?”

Alec hummed again.

“But I guess there are other missions _parabatai_ could take on – something that’s not the average killing demons, you know?”

Alec sighed and finally let his book down. He was a bit pale and Jace wasn’t sure if it was because of the pain in his ribs or something else.

“Why do you keep talking to me about what _parabatai_ could do instead of asking the person you want to be paired with?” he finally asked, something like hurt in his voice.

Jace looked at him, mouth gaping, not believing his own ears. Alec couldn’t possibly have said what he had just said!

“ _What_?” Jace finally said incredulously. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Alec squirmed a little, obviously uncomfortable (and probably a little in pain, given the way his lips were pinched together), and Jace had to restrain himself not to move too fast – and move the mattress at the same time – while he pushed himself into a sitting position.

“I talk about it with _you_ because I want _you_ to be my _parabatai_! Who on earth did you think I was talking about?”

Alec looked at him, eyes wide open, before lowering them and curling a little on himself, book forgotten next to him. He opened his mouth before closing it without a word. Jace waited, trying to keep a leash on his temper, decided to get to the bottom of the issue. He absently noticed the way Alec licked his lips before finally answering, too busy preparing his arguments.

“I thought you wanted to prepare me to the idea that we wouldn’t spend that much time together, once you picked your _parabatai_ ,” Alec finally answered in a low voice, keeping his eyes fixed on his book cover.

Silence hovered between them for a beat before Jace finally spoke out, still incredulous.

“This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard you say,” and he was really hurt, this time. “Do you really think so little of me? That I would rub it off in your face, if I wanted to bind myself to someone else?”

Alec sighed.

“I wouldn’t call it rubbing it off in my face – especially if you want me to be your _parabatai_ ,” he added hastily, finally raising his eyes towards Jace. “But it wouldn’t be a good idea for _anyone_ to bind themselves to me, and even less for you… The Inquisitor won’t like it.”

“I don’t care if she doesn’t like it!” Jace spit out, definitively pissed off. “She isn’t my mom. If I want _you_ to be my _parabatai_ , then she doesn’t get to have a say in that, period. _You’re_ the only who does,” he added, his voice calmer.

It hurt, to see the hesitation on Alec’s face, but Jace could understand where it was coming from, now that he had all the cards in hands. It was difficult to be a Lightwood at the Institute, and even if their friendship had been the cause of many raised eyebrows – amongst other things – them becoming _parabatai_ would probably cause nastier reactions than what had happened until now.

Jace didn’t care. He knew he could protect Alec – and Izzy too, and he knew Alec would always have his back. Loyalty wasn’t an empty word where he was concerned.

“It’s a big decision,” Alec finally said, still looking a bit shaken up, and Jace felt bad for his outburst. “Give me until tomorrow to give you my answer, please?”

“Okay,” Jace answered hastily, glad to have finally gotten his proposition out. “Take your time,” he added a moment later, a weak smile on his lips.

It seriously hadn’t gone the way he had wanted to, but at least he was done, and he knew Alec would seriously consider it now. Always very throughout, his best friend – outweighing all options before making a decision.

ooOoo

The Inquisitor hadn’t liked it _at all_ , but Jace had stood his ground, with Alec at his side – always at his side, the only person he could trust with his life and be trusted in return – and they had gotten the authorization to go through the _parabatai_ ceremony, in the end. Some days, Jace still couldn’t believe it – never mind that it had been _years_ now, there were still mornings where he woke up with a gasp from a nightmare, and only the pulsing feeling in his rune managed to calm him down enough for him to remember he was safe at the Institute. He never liked waking up like that, but being around Alec always made it better.

(Alec made _everything_ better. And having a piece of his soul next to his own… it was like coming home. Jace _knew_ he was loved, and he loved in return, fiercely, intensely. Some days, he just didn’t know if Alec could feel it – not when he had trained himself to block some emotions. Being _parabatai_ made them more sensible to pain, and they had to be careful not to let it slip through their bond, when they were fighting.)

But the missions they went on together… It was more exhilarating than Jace could have expected it to be – and _fun_ too. A fun that Izzy was partaking into, tagging along with them every time she could, which never failed to cheer him up. She was like the little sister he had never knew he wanted, but he couldn’t imagine his life without her now.

(And the Inquisitor _liked_ her, strange as it was – said she was the best forensic she had seen at the New York Institute in _years_. It did make things easier for sure.)

Besides, they had become the best group of fighters at the New York Institute. Alec and him had always worked well together, but once they had become _parabatai_ … well, there was nothing they couldn’t face as long as they were together. And Izzy was always teaming up with them now that they were all cleared for field missions, which made for a nice association – and a deadly one, as far as demons were concerned.

No, all in one, everything was _good_ since a couple of years – as good as it could get, anyway.

And then Clary Fray had appeared in their lives.

Jace had immediately been drawn to her and her quest for her mother – still wishing he could have saved his father – but Alec hadn’t felt in the same way. In fact, he had been opposed to everything they had done to help her – he and Izzy, who was eager for a friend of her own, detached from the other Shadowhunters at the Institute as she was. It had caused a rift between them and it scared Jace shitless.

He didn’t want to lose Alec – _never_ – but he couldn’t give up on his mission, not when they were so close to finding Clary’s mom. Once it was done, he could explain everything to the Inquisitor – who had picked a new envoy to look over the Institute just a few days after Clary had arrived, obviously not satisfied with what had happened. Lydia Branwell was as sharp as one could be, and she had taken a liking to Alec – enough to be kind to him, but clearly not enough to deter her from her mission.

(Jace didn’t know, of course, that Hodge had tried to shield them from the blame they were sure to all get – to no avail. He didn’t know either than most of the pressure to _put an end to this madness_ , as the Inquisitor called it – had fallen onto Alec’s shoulders, not realizing it was a test they weren’t sure to pass.

The Lightwood name still wasn’t trusted, after all these years.)

Maybe this was why they had ended up in front of the City of Bones, after all. Meliorn had been an unfortunate casualty of the Clave’s methods towards the Downworlders, but Izzy had panicked at the idea he would get tortured, and they had come up with a plan to rescue him – without mentioning it to Alec. It was better he didn’t know what was happening – neither Izzy nor Jace wanted to put him in that spot, not when he still had to prove the worth of the Lightwood name every day – but they hadn’t counted on him being the one to lead the mission.

Jace seriously didn’t want to fight his _parabatai_ and, for the first time, regretted that Clary was here. The pure look of betrayal on Alec’s face when he had seen them standing together… well, it was more than he could bear.

Tackling Alec on the ground had been hard, but seeing the pain in his eyes – the betrayal, and something that Jace refused to recognize as acceptance – well… he wasn’t so sure he had made the right choice, all of a sudden.

The fight had been brutal, although they had pulled their punches, but stuck under Alec as he had ended up, Jace couldn’t help but feel he was on the verge of a cliff – one he wouldn’t be able to go back to if he said the wrong words.

“Alec please,” he finally choked, eyeing the Seraph blade from the corner of his eye – it was barely an inch away from his throat. “ _Parabatai_ …”

“ _Don’t call me that_ ,” Alec hissed, eyes bright and voice choking. “ _How could you –_ ”

Jace frowned, before forcing his body to relax.

“How could I what?” he asked tentatively.

He suspected this wasn’t about Meliorn at all anymore – and probably had never been.

Alec laughed – a dark, brittle sound he didn’t like in the slightest – before finally letting himself fall on the ground next to Jace, blade forgotten at his side.

“Of course, you don’t see it,” Alec whispered in a low voice, trying to curl onto himself – and it was a sad sight to behold, one he hadn’t seen in a long time.

Jace gingerly sat next to him before carefully putting his hand on Alec’s forearm, the leather of his jacket cold under his fingers. They stayed in silence for a moment, trying to get their breath back under control.

“I always knew someone would come,” Alec finally said in a low, miserable voice. “That I would get replaced...”

“ _Nobody_ is replacing you!” Jace protested, feeling dread pool in his stomach. “No one,” he insisted, trying to convince Alec through their bond.

Had it really come to that? He had thought his _parabatai_ knew better by now – that his insecurities had abated enough by the years that he now knew that Jace would never give up on him.

He had been wrong.

Alec obviously didn’t believe a word he had said.

“You’re doing everything you can for Clary – no matter the cost for _us_. For me,” he added, almost as an afterthought, and Jace bit his lip.

Hard – enough to draw blood.

“She’s just trying to find her mom –”

“And we’re going to be punished if the unsanctioned missions don’t stop,” Alec went on, refusing to look at him. “The City of Bones… or even exile, maybe.”

His words hang heavy in the air. Jace had never seen him look so utterly defeated – as if all fight was gone from his body.

“I won’t let it happen,” he promised, moving his hand towards Alec’s neck in a familiar gesture. “I won’t. Nobody’s taking you away.”

“You can’t know that,” Alec murmured before letting himself indulge in the gesture – a telltale sign he needed the comfort.

“I _know_ it,” Jace protested, sure of himself. “Nobody’s laying a finger on you under my watch. _No one_.”

Alec finally raised his eyes towards him, insecurity shining bright in the moonlight, and Jace suddenly knew he had to make a move, now. Moving his hands to cup Alec’s face, he gently stroked his cheeks before leaning towards him, making his intentions known.

The kiss was sweet and yet more intense than anything he had ever experimented.

“ _Parabatai_ ,” he whispered afterwards, opening his eyes to find Alec looking at him like he was Raziel itself. “No one is coming between us – not Clary, not the Clave, _no one_. Trust me on that.”

Alec looked at him hesitantly before licking his lips – licking Jace’s blood away – and nodding slightly.

“Okay,” he whispered softly before turning towards Jace, one hand gently cupping his head.

Kissing in front of the City of Bones probably should have felt more sacrilegious, but Jace could only feel the pure love running through their bond – warmth and hope and acceptance all in one. If the Clave thought this was wrong… well, it wouldn’t be the first mistake they had made.

He didn’t owe them anything after all – and neither did Alec. It was the two of them against whatever the Clave would throw at them – always would be.


End file.
